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Life has been busy! Just the way we like it! Alex has been preaching some, he wasn't able to keep his job and go to Uganda in May. We've learned to lean on Him. 

In Oct my brother-in-law Cory got married! 

Nehemiah was the ring bearer and Virginia was one of the flower girls. 

 

I've been doing a few craft shows with my crayons. I've made a lot of friends along the way!! It's been a lot of fun! :) 

 

Sorry it's been ssoooooo long since I've last updated, hopefully I don't go months without an update again, but I cannot make any promises ;)

 

 

Hope everyone had a great 4th of July! We spent ours at a parade then later went to my sister's house. 

We've had an exciting couple of weeks, last week we were heading up to Defiance to my SIL's birthday party and soon after leaving town we were in the middle of a terrible storm. Alex pulled into a church parking lot for some cover, but even then our van was going up and down and back and forth. We went home after the storm let up, and we had a tree down in our yard, and no power. We were without power for about 24 hours. We were pretty blessed that it came on so quickly, my parents were without power for 6 days, and I'm not sure if my in-laws have power yet. 

Tomorrow, my baby will be one! I'm still not sure how I feel about this! I love watching each new stage!

She gets into everything now, and is a very busy baby. She's still the happiest baby I know! She knows some words. She says "Hi" and Baby, sometimes she'll say Jana, she says "happy" and will clap her hands. The funniest one to me is when she sees a camera she'll say "Cheeeeeeeeeeeese!!" 

I haven't found much she won't eat (honestly, I can't think of anything off the top of my head!!) 

She loves to pat and rock baby dolls, it's so sweet!! 

Strange to think that one year ago I didn't know what was in store for me as I got ready to go into the hospital. From being rushed into surgery, to watching them work on my blue baby, them not telling Alex, and finally seeing her take that first breath of air, and watching that little body turn pink, I don't think those images will ever leave me. 

Happy 1st birthday Jana (meaning God's gracious gift) Renee (meaning: reborn or born again)

Stitches and Sundays

Sunday morning did NOT start out the way we intended. Alex had taken Nehemiah into church to go to the bathroom and I followed behind with the girls. 

When I walked in I heard Nehemiah screaming. If you've heard him when he's hurt, it's not a pleasant sound. 

He'd ran ahead of Alex and hit a metal pole in the basement. With his face. 

Alex had blood on his hands, and Nehemiah had it on his face. He had a nice sized hole on his jaw line. 

Alex and Ben Erickson both thought that taking him to ER for stitches would be best, so off we went. 

We did the usual signing in and they got us to a room pretty quickly. 

Then the waiting started. They were good about checking on him and keeping us up to date. 

After all the paperwork and everything was filled out they said it would require some stitches. I was kinda hoping he'd have glue, or even the dissolving stitches, but no luck there. He got the nasty black stitches. 

They put a numbing thing on his face for about 30 mins, and then put him on the bed. As soon as that needle touched his face, he shot up and screamed!! He looked the doctor in the face and said, "THAT HURT!!!" They called another nurse in to hold his head. The doctor tried to tell him that his face was numb, he couldn't feel it and started again. Miah screamed, "I can feel that!! It hurts!!" 

They swaddled him, his legs and arms were strapped down and got the needle to give him a shot to numb it. By then Jana was upset so her and I walked in the hallway outside the room. I could hear him screaming, "No more medicine!! That hurts, no more medicine" 

He finally calmed down, and the shot must have worked. They were able to put the stitches in. Let me tell you, watching them take a needle and thread to your child's face, is really gross. 

He got a blue teddy bear and I informed him that I do NOT like this birthday tradition that he's taken upon himself to start. Last year he'd stuck a crayon up his nose and that required surgery. So he got a teddy bear then. Next year....we'll buy him one. ;) Even going to Build-A-Bear would be cheaper than the bill we'll get from this stunt.

Now...for the pictures

They aren't very good, because he didn't want anyone looking at the stitches. BTW...he got four

Life as we know it

For two and a half weeks the kids and I were on our own as Alex was in Uganda. If you asked my kids where Dad was, they'd have told you, "He's in Africa, helping people learn about Jesus"

We stayed busy visiting friends, going to the zoo, and just having fun together. :)

June 18th Nehemiah will be 4!! He says he wants to start school because he's "big enough" 

We're going to wait another year to send him to school. I want him to stay a little boy just a little bit longer!

Virginia has been a big helper! She thinks any baby doll she sees at a thrift store, garage sale, or even at a regular store needs to be "rescued" by her!! Her hair is getting so long!!

Hard to believe that last year this little girl wasn't here yet!! She's such a wonderful addition to our family!

She is a very busy baby! She's a very fast crawler, and pulls herself up with anything. She's a Mommy girl at the moment, but that's subject to change ;) She loves to eat!! If she thinks someone is eating and she's not, she will get upset!!

I've scheduled a few craft shows! One is June 9th in Lima! Please pray I do well. :)

April

Easter 2012 Nehemiah age 3, Virginia age 2, Jana age 9 months

All dressed and ready to go hear Daddy preach

I recently had a Pampered Chef party, I got each other the kids a knife ;) The two older ones think they're cool! (Jana's is put up for now)

My Pretty Princess

 

Prince Charming. Sorry, I don't know how to flip it on here!

The Round Up Gang!!

Because everyone needs a smile :)

 

 

New crayons

M-I-C-K-E-Y

 A piece of the puzzle

 A Princess Pack

 Prince Charming pack

 Into the Jungle

Dino-rawrs!

If you'd like to check all my crayons, you can look at my facebook page: He Cares Crayons

I love you

I love you. 

Do we say these 3 simple words often enough? Or do we hold back b/c we don't know how people will respond? 

Do we say them too freely? 

How often do you wish you'd told someone one last time that you love them? 

Is there someone you'd tell right now if you could? 

I remember when my Grandma died, my Mom told us that she was struggling to get something out. Grandpa was in the kitchen and Mom called him in and said, "Mom wants you" He told her that Grandma couldn't have done anything to let her think that, she was out of it and wasn't talking. She said, "No, she wants you" So Grandpa went in, and Grandma struggled to say, "I love you" Those were her final words. She passed away later that night. 

I can still picture Jason in my living room, needing to leave, but he couldn't. He kept telling Nehemiah, "I love you" Just so he could hear Nehemiah say it back. Jason looked at me and said, "I just love hearing him say, I love you" 

Little ones love unconditionally. They love with everything. 

They tell you, "I love you" when you need to hear it most. 

Countless times during the day my kids will hug me and say, "I love you Mom to the moon and back, into the ocean and around and around and around" Now, I don't know where they came up with it, but I love hearing it all the same. 

Be sure to tell you spouse you love them, your parents, brothers, sisters, friends, hey, even your dog or cat if you want! 

To my family, I do love you. I know I'm not good at saying it, or expressing it, but I do all the same. And someday, we'll go and tell Jason we love him, and Grandma, and Josh, and all our other lost loved ones. 

And that's one thing I wonder, why do we call them "lost loved ones?" They know where they are, we know where they are....just something I wonder about :) 

My Loves

I know many times my posts are sad and depressing, so I thought I'd post somethings that make me smile! My kids!! I love them so much!! Nehemiah is my big helper!! He helps feed Jana, does what he's told and just growing up too fast!! We recently got him a twin bed....*sniff* Didn't we JUST set his crib up!? 

Virginia talks ALL the time, and sings, and dances. She loves playing with her Lalaloopsy dolls!! She's a good listener!! :) She got Nehemiah's toddler bed. :( Too bad she'd rather wake up in the night and come to MY bed!

Jana is a doll baby! She coos, crawls, and cuddles!! :) She's sleeping so well during the night (Hey...I'm a Mom...sleep makes me happy!!) She's always there with a smile! 

My crayons are doing pretty well....I have a "spring line" hahaha I think they're adorable! If you haven't checked out my Facebook page, it's He Cares Crayons 

I'm so silly

Nehemiah picked out his clothes this morning, went into the bathroom and came out giggling. He thought it would be funny to dress wrong. He said, "Mommy, I'm so silly!! I need to go back and fix my clothes"

I thought it was rather cute that he was being silly. (He does know how to get himself dressed...and has been for awhile....he did this on purpose)

A tough subject

Suicide

What do you think when you hear that word?

Do you think of it as a game?

Maybe an escape?

Does a tear come to your eye as you think of someone who has killed themselves?

We've all wondered if we died today who would miss us.

Who would cry.

Would people go on like nothing happened?

Maybe you've even wondered how you'd die.

Maybe you've thought about ending your own life.

You've thought about how to do it...planned it...decided it was time.

You were done.

But you stopped.

Why?

Maybe someone caught you.

Maybe you realized it will get better.

Maybe you got scared.

Did you wonder how people would feel if you went through with it?

I can tell you how they'd feel.

They'd cry...a lot.

When they think of you.

On your birthday.

The anniversary of your death.

When they see a picture of you.

When a sad some comes on in the car.

When they're in church, singing about Heaven, knowing that's where you are waitin on them.

And they get mad.

They wonder why they weren't enough.

Mad that they couldn't stop you.

Mad that you made such a horrible mistake.

And they hurt.

They want you here.

They need you here.

They wonder how you'd have changed.

If you'd have more kids.

What you'd be driving.

Wondering if you'd be happy.

If you'd have been taller?

Wondering why they weren't enough.

Couldn't we make you happy?

Didn't you want to see your child, your neices, nephews, grow up?

You'd leave a dog that will miss you.

A Mom

A Dad

Sisters

brothers

friends

family

me

Sometimes...

Sometimes I wonder who people see when they look at me.

Do they see a Mother, with three little ones.

A wife, who is trying her hardest to be submissive.

A sister, who is missing a sibling.

Do they look at me and think, "There is the woman who is living in a hotel"

Do they think I'm happy, sad, hurt, confused.

We are who we are because of those who are in our lives. Without Alex, I wouldn't be a wife.

Without Nehemiah, Virginia and Jana, I wouldn't be a Mom.

Without my parents, I wouldn't be a daughter.

Without Stephanie, Nicole, Joseph, Jason, Jordan and Jesse, I wouldn't be a sister.

Without Micah, Adaliah, Jadyn, and Titus, I wouldn't be an Aunt.

Earlier tonight I dropped my brother off at the school and saw a girl, and I wondered if she knew Jason, and wondered if she looked at me as a girl who lost her brother.

Thing is, I didn't lose my brother, I know where he is. I KNOW I'll see him again. It was a terrible day that Jason left this World, but he's rejoicing and waiting.

But still I wonder, have people forgotten him? Or do they look at me with pity?

Do they look at me and wonder if I've lost my mind for having a 3 year old, a 2 year old and a 6 month old.

I hear so many negative comments about having children that close that people don't stop to hear that I love it. I cannot imagine my life without these three blessings.

Do people see that I adore my husband? Do they notice that I struggle to be a better wife? Can they tell that he makes me so happy, but he's also the one who could break my heart if he wanted to.

Do people pity me, or are they jealous? Can they see the bags under my eyes from staying up too late, worrying about things that will wait until tomorrow. Can they tell that I was up countless times with my kids, because they need me, they're hungry, thristy, in need of the bathroom?

Or....do they see me? A Wife, a Mom, a Sister, cousin, friend, aunt, daughter-in-law, neice, a person who needs loved.